• Tasi Alabastro

How to avoid digital lash backs

It’s happened to everyone at least once, some more than others. I’m talking about the moment when you’re in an elevated state of rage and the words out of your mouth are sharp enough to draw blood. You start to see red, and your hands shake uncontrollable; You might even have unpredictable bowel movement. The person or people responsible for enraging you are in sight and you’re ready to put them on blast, online –STOP.

Breath. And again. One more. Good.

Often we’re confronted with choices, some more clear than others with consequences that can lead to heartache, friendships dissolving, or worse, regrets. And who wants to live their life with regrets? I regard regrets as mental gouts. No one wants those (admittedly, I honestly feel some are just prone to them anyway).

With the rise of social media platforms like Twitter and Facebook, informing the World of your feelings using harsh and ambiguously pointed flaming has taken over actually resolving the issue with said person face to face. Here are a couple of ways to combat that digitally primal urge to come up on top of someone else.

Put the phone and/or keyboard away.

While I’m not a 100% behind the social discipline technique of TIME OUT, I think stepping back from a potentially volatile situation with another person is a fine way to avoid foot in mouth. It would seem that our sharpest retort and call back formulate at the peak of arguments but can we be so sure? Don’t be afraid to take a walk, enjoy some fresh air, and allow your brain to find clarity. Again, just physically distancing yourself from anything that would potentially leak your ramble of thoughts can be a tremendous help.

Is there a draft in here, or is it just me?

If you absolutely must write something –do it. But don’t publish it. Instead, save it as a draft and revisit it in a week. Do you still feel the same towards the person and event? No? Mission accomplished. I’ve employed this technique many times and find it incredibly effective. Why do I care less, now that a week has passed? Who knows but I find it a good fortune. But what if you do feel the same, you ask. Well, then I can’t stop you. Do what you must, be know that there will be consequences. Even broken dishes.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, tweet people the way you want to be tweeted. (The Digital Golden Rule) What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comment box below, or tweet me (nicely!) Follow @tasialabastro

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